Blue Man Group and Five Points

We braved the cold last night and went out to see the Blue Man Group and eat dinner at Five Points.

I would have preferred to stay home. Let’s start with Five Points. I had actually heard good things. Good home cooking, so we decided to try it out. When we walked in, it was so nice and toasty inside. Nice vibe, packed at the bar. Actually packed in the back too. Why? The caesar salad was so fishy tasting that we sent it back. The baked pasta was actually pretty good. My kids inhaled that. The hanger steak was tough with raw onions chopped on top with onion rings that were barely cooked. The chicken was overdone with tarragon and just not that interesting. I had the artic char with braised fennel. It was so overcome with butter that I felt like taking out a napkin to mop it up. All of the herbs used with each dish actually didn’t make much sense. It was a chef trying to make something different and cutting edge out of simple home cooked food. Don’t. Stick with the basics. We split 3 mediocre desserts. The special of the night was lemon meringue tart. Ok but not great. The crust was very hard. The chocolate brioche bread pudding was bland and mushy and the chocolate tart was just dense. All and all, very disappointing. When you go out in NYC, or anywhere for that matter, and you spend that kind of money, you should have a great meal. That is probably why I always return to the classics, Grammercy Tavern, Babbo, Union Square Cafe, Gotham Bar and Grill, etc.

Blue Man Group. This is basically performance art of the worst kind. This act has been showing in NYC for 20 years and is now spanning the globe. I don’t get it. I finally decided to go and check it out. Figured the kids would like it. It was boring, loud, and dumb. I actually think a majority of the audience had been there before. Maybe we just don’t appreciate this type of performance. My Mom came and she started falling asleep. My middle daughter, who is 10, decided that she was exhausted and kept asking when it was over and put her head on my shoulder to go to sleep. My eldest daughter, 12, nodded off on the other shoulder. I asked my son, who is almost 8, if he wanted to leave. He initially said no but seconds later said, this is bad, can we leave? So, all 5 of us jumped up and left in the middle of the performance. Thank god.

So, major money down the drain for bad theater and bad food. As my middle daughter put it, “hey mom, you just never know.”

Comments (Archived):

  1. Stephen

    Hmmmm….I had a decent meal there on sunday night.

    Before you rule it out, I recommend the brunch there. Eggs in the wood burning oven and churros with hot chocolate…..

  2. scotty the body

    I saw the Blue Man Group in Las Vegas and, after an entertaining start, found myself wondering, “when is this over?” My sister leaned over to me about halfway through and said, “what is happening, right now?”

    The end was cool, but only because of the scale of it. They unleashed giant rolls of, basically, toilet paper at the back of the audience and everybody threw them around and ended up all wrapped up in paper. It was fun and intense, but hardly worth the money. It was like the time I saw Phish and they handed out rolls of bubble wrap and let all their tripping listeners sit around and pop bubbles for about ten minutes: cool, but hardly worth seeing Phish for.

    I have some friends in Portland, Oregon, musicians and hipsters all, who were watching the Oscars or some such thing, and Moby ended up teaming up with the Blue Man Group or something. Stephen proclaimed, “this is my hell,” and left the room. Indeed.