I Love Them, I Love Him Not

Judith Warner wrote a really interesting editorial in the NYTimes on Valentines Day called I Love Them, I Love Him Not.  She wrote about how Valentines Day is no longer for lovers.  How it is transformed into a holidays for parents loving their kids. 

Now, I admit my mother always gave us Valentines Day gifts.  I have done the same for our kids.  It is a sweet holiday.  The article was about the national obsession with our children.  What is it all about?

People attempt to give their kids everything.  They sacrifice every waking moment for the kid’s sports leagues, their events, their activities, their homework etc.  When is enough, enough?  Can’t they have their own freedome and independence.  Why do I see more parents not give their kids boundaries and at the same time  plan their entire lives? 

The magazines this month have all written articles on keeping the marital romance alive.  I read an article that suggested that couples should plan on times to have sex.  Plan that into your week.  Supermom and Superdad are so busy from work and the children’s bliss that they haven’t found time for each other.  It is ridiculous!

Kids learn from their role models which generally happen to be the people living in their house.  If they see happy loving parents – with each other – the chances are they will go on to have happy loving relationships.  Being a bit selfish isn’t such a bad thing. 

My advice, bag the Saturday night basketball game for your kid, and go out on a date with your spouse.  Make sure you book one night a week for the 2 of you.  Leave the kids at home.  Make time during the craze of the weekend to turn off the kids.  At the end of the day, it will be better for you, and your kids.