I have been spending a lot of time pondering what should I do next or what else should I do. Right now, every day is a different day. There isn’t anything that sits in side me that when I get up every day I can dig my teeth into. On one hand, I really miss that. On the other hand, will I be able to do that and remain flexible and focused on my priorities right now? So, I am going down the path of really clearing out the debris and trying to figure out if I filled those 20 hours what exactly would it be. I could do a variety of things but what is it that would truly rock my world. Not sure if I will ever figure that one but then again, it can’t hurt to try.
As I make my way down this path, I found myself sitting home for three days with Josh who is home with a stomach bug. Watching movies, hanging out, etc. I had a few things I needed to do but I basically spent the majority of time at home with him. Jessica had a bad day and wanted to meet me for lunch this week. It was about 45 minutes before lunch when she called me. I was totally available. We got together, if only for half an hour, and I was able to be there just to listen and be supportive.
Those are the small moments. If I wasn’t available, it wouldn’t have been a big deal but the moment would have passed. The fact that I could be there was worth a lot and could never been replaced by checking in at the end of the day. Those small moments go a long way. Those are the moments that puts life into perspective and why I ( and also Fred ) are a big presence in our home.
Maybe I don’t need to fill those few empty hours during the day….and then again, maybe a few wouldn’t hurt.