Sometimes all you need is a good cry

I read an article in Japan last week that the country is trying to push people to cry to relieve stress.  I am a huge fan of a good cry.

We are trained at an early age to not cry.  Why?  I hear people say, “don’t cry, it will be ok”.  What they should say is “cry all you want, it will make you feel much better.”

I read that in Japan they are creating opportunities for people to cry from movies to books to music.  The stress of the day to day world gets to all of us.  Everyone reacts differently to stress.  Some seem to be able to soldier through while others crumble.  Some act like all is well and good but internally they are a mess and that mess starts to raise its ugly head in different ways when you keep all the stress inside.

Crying should not be considered a form of weakness but something to make you feel better.  It can relieve stress, lower your blood pressure, remove toxins from the body and gives you a feeling of relief.

I read an article that Neuroscientist Dr. William H. Frey II, Ph.D., founder and co-director of the Alzheimer’s Research Center at Regions Hospital in St. Paul, Minnesota, has spent over 20 years studying crying and tears.

According to Frey, “Crying is not only a human response to sorrow and frustration, but it’s also a healthy one.” It is a natural way to reduce emotional stress that, if left unchecked, can have negative physical effects on the body, including increased risk of cardiovascular disease and other stress-related disorders.

After spending a week in Japan, I found that the Japanese that we came across were tightly wired, followed rules and were aiming to please.  Perhaps that is a cultural thing and then I came across the article about the powers that be in Japan pushing the concept of crying to children and the workplace.  I really love it.

So perhaps this week everyone should listen to some music that they find incredibly moving and let the tears flow or read a book that speaks to your emotions and tear up or go see a real weeper of a film and have a good sob.  Trust me, you will feel fantastic afterward.


Comments (Archived):

  1. awaldstein

    Ha!I feel like an alien with this topic.Dunno where to look to find this impulse but I’ll accept the challenge.New stuff and change is always worth exploring.

    1. Gotham Gal

      I swear it feels great

      1. awaldstein

        I hope I am crying for joy on the 7th!

        1. Gotham Gal

          Me too!

        2. JLM

          .You will probably be having a good cry one way or another.JLMwww.themusingsofthebigredca…

          1. Donna Brewington White

            Me too.

  2. LD Eakman

    Nothing in life will make you feel better than your dog licking up your tears after a good cry – “Lucky” was my hero. Wish I had a picture of her to post.

    1. JLM

      .Half of what you would ever want to know about a person can be revealed by understanding their relationship with their dog.JLMwww.themusingsofthebigredca…

  3. JLM

    .Very interesting topic.JLMwww.themusingsofthebigredca…

  4. bsoist

    I have an interesting relationship with crying. I cry very easily at things that tug at one’s heart – movies, music, etc, I even almost came to tears reading a tweet yesterday 🙂 – but I can’t remember the last time I did any “sad crying” and I am not sure why, actually. I’m absolutely an optimist but I do have times when I think I’m sad enough to cry. But I don’t. It might just be the way my dad trained me to “just get back to work.”We encouraged our children to cry – when we thought it was real. 🙂

    1. Gotham Gal

      I am pretty much the same. Can cry easily when my heart strings are pulled but not as easily on personal emotional things

      1. AMT Editorial Staff

        Exactly. Have you seen video for the song “Happier” by Bastille/Marshmello? Heart strings pulled easily there….

    2. LE

      moviesWell I wouldn’t call it ‘crying’ (which was more accurately described in my comment here) but more like ‘tear up’.An example was the last scene in an Officer and a Gentleman (Richard Gere, Debrah Winger) when he whisked her off the factory floor and took her away. Of course that was judgemental on my part. I saw her as a nobody who was working doing a shit job in a factory. So having this naval aviator take her away from that caused me to tear up. I will usually though have a similar reaction (slight tear up) with any movie or tv where someone is mistreated or bullied even if they are a villain.I am sure you remember back when it was Barbra Walters goal to get people she interviewed to cry (parodied on SNL and copied by others).

      1. bsoist

        right – I actually don’t have a “real cry” at a movie. It’s usually tearing up like you described, though sometimes it builds up to the point where I really do cry.And to @gothamgal:disqus ‘s point, I sometimes decide it’s okay to just go ahead and cry. Usually, I do prefer no one is looking, though.

        1. LE

          Half kidding (just not sure which half) but there could be a ‘cry challenge’ someone tries to get it on film and if they don’t cry they donate to charity. (Onions not allowed)

    3. Donna Brewington White

      Similar.Sometimes I want to cry so badly during a painful experience and just can’t, but show me a video of a dog greeting a returning soldier and…boom.Weddings and funerals are reliable as well.Thankfully, I married a man who can cry and my kids inherited this.

  5. jason wright

    Japan was a military dictatorship for centuries, and a closed country for two hundred years circa 1650-1850. Foreigners setting foot in Japan were executed on the spot. The culture is still one of hiding true thoughts and feelings out of fear.I cry easily.

  6. Pointsandfigures

    Can you cry to The Clash? The last thing that brought tears to my eyes was the terminal cancer patient who is a student at Purdue.

  7. LE

    I agree. The last time that this was relevant with me was in a past relationship where the other party was abusive. (Yes this does happen to men). I stayed and stuck it out. [1] I took the opportunity to also do a daily writing on what was happening which I thought might one day be the basis for something that I would have to say about my experience. That helped a great deal. But honestly sometimes you just had to let loose. I never had an issue with doing this either (despite never seeing any role model do the same and being raised not to cry as a boy). [2] It was a rough time.Another case was when I walked out on a job during high school when the boss (who loved me to that point) yelled at me for trying to get my then girlfriend a summer job with one of the associate attorneys. The younger associate (who at my age I thought of as a boss as well) said ‘oh if Bill doesn’t want to (his boss) I will pay her to organize my tax book papers tell her that’. Bill heard about this and called me into his office and said ‘I am the boss and I will decide and scolded me’. That was enough to set me off. I burst out of the office and quit. His secretary who really liked and depended on me was laughing as I walked out. (This by the way was probably similar to what Blasey-Ford experienced with the ‘laughing’ I remember the look on her face to this day of amusement at what had just happened.[1] Yes, once again, this does happen to men and it has nothing to do with finances or the ability to not leave – emotionally it’s hard to get out because it is not bad every single day (anyone who has been through this knows what I am talking about most likely. )[2] I probably have told my ‘sit over there with the rest of the crybabies’ story before. My mom dropped me off to overnight camp when my parents had to go away on business to a trade show. The male counselor seemed really nice and said something to me like ‘look little boy everything will be ok. Just come with me it’s ok let’s go and play’ . I left my mom (no choice, right?) and as we slowly walked away (and she faded in the distance; that will be in the script in my ‘movie’) we got closer to what appeared to be some other children who were eating at a table. He took my hand and literally flung me to the table and said ‘now sit over there with the rest of the crybabies!!’. Honestly really happened.. Cause of permanent damage for sure. Remember that incident to this day. And it is a story that i always tell and use that phrase now but in a joking manner. (Once again like Blasey-Ford don’t remember anything surrounding it or even the camp name (might have been Rose Twig but not even sure).

  8. LE

    Off topic but interesting article if you haven’t read it yet (essentially google controls the exit to preserve their reputation):…This is an example of what I have said here previously about what happens when companies age. [1][1] Also see references in that story on Page and Brin as well with their behavior. And remember this was a company that started out as ‘don’t be evil’; I knew it would happen this way it always does. It’s human nature once you get power plain and simple.

  9. JLM

    .Never been much of a cryer. Made a few others cry.The saddest book I have ever read was Beach Music by Pat Conroy. Now, that book will make you cry.JLMwww.themusingsofthebigredca…

  10. AMT Editorial Staff

    Absolutely fascinating. LOVE it!