What happened to Etiquette?

I have become very diligent about unsubscribing from lists that I never subscribed to. I hit spam and unsubscribe. It just seems to get worse every year.

Then there are the spam phone calls. I had one for a year about how I needed to deal with my student loan. I had a super aggressive one a few weeks about about someone hacking my computer. They called about 6 times a day for a week or two. Now I have one that calls about my back issues. I did not even know I had back issues.

I downloaded an app that recognizes the spam calls and immediately shuts them off. Joy! Although recently I have been starting to get texts asking to support organizations and politicians. Somehow the emails and the phone calls piss me off and they are annoying but the texts cross another divide.

I can’t help but ask where is the etiquette? Is etiquette just lost. My phone number is personal. I do not want random people or organizations texting me. It is a line that has been crossed. Maybe it is my age or maybe it is the onslaught of constant crap that shows up in front of my eyeballs but I wonder is anything private anymore?

Comments (Archived):

  1. Susan Rubinsky

    I actually still have a land line. I use it as my phone number for all things I sign up for, that way when it gets sold (it always gets sold) they have no way to really contact me. I leave my voice mail full on the land line so no one can leave a message. I only give my cell phone to my clients and my friends.

    1. Gotham Gal

      I love a landline.

    2. lauraglu

      It’s so interesting how phone numbers are now considered private information – it’s really that personal element that is the differentiator. Landline numbers were/are generally public, available to call, and, almost inevitably shared!I think the transition from landlines to cellphones never really covered that etiquette might be different for a private line.And I agree, everything is too invasive now. Just not sure the solution.

      1. Susan Rubinsky

        My solution is a cobbled together hack job. But for now, it works pretty good. I tried using a Google voice number for a while but found it annoying because it sends you transcripts of the messages. I want something that will filter out all the noise (or even a majority of the noise would be nice).

    3. PhilipSugar

      Ooma is your friend.

  2. Tracey Jackson

    I have been so infuriated lately over the amount of time I spend each day unsubscribing and like locusts more appear the next day. I am big anti-Tump supporter, but I can’t get 95 emails a day from the varoius groups. I was signing petions for an hour a day. I unsubcribe, I delte them from my inbox.I use my landlane but only my mom or kids call me on it. It’s insane. And I don’t the crossover of privacy is really too much.I agree.

  3. Dennis Mangalindan

    Would you mind sharing the name of the app that you downloaded that notifies you if a call is spam?

    1. Gotham Gal

      True Caller

    2. Susan Rubinsky

      My cell phone automatically filers out the (few) Spam calls I get. It doesn’t even allow the callers to leave messages. I’m on a Droid with Verizon. I think it’s a Verizon app that comes with the phone. I loved that it just worked out of box.

  4. LE

    Maybe it is my age or maybeI think one thing that is true when you get older is that you realize that it’s not you. When you are younger you are not sure if there is something you aren’t doing right or that you don’t know. As you get older you begin to see how the things that people (and businesses) do are stupid and screwed up and cause you pain. And instead of thinking that there is something that you don’t know or that you did wrong, you realize the world is just filled with people who are mediocre at their jobs and (to your point perhaps) ‘don’t care’. It is also filled with higher level decisions makers (what you call ‘old white men’) who don’t feel the pain that they inflict as they are not on the front lines and don’t have to experience it personally.This is a reason why you never want to own a restaurant. People think it’s about the food and the atmosphere and finances ‘making the numbers work’.. But at the core it’s like any small business. It’s getting people to show up and do their job and not make mistakes. If you’ve ever owned a small business (I have) that isn’t filled with higher caliber people (recent IVY Grads or who they hire) (I have) you will realize that simple task ‘show up and do your job’ is extremely difficult to pull off.

  5. AMT Editorial Staff

    Perfect example of #groupThink. If you asked any INDIVIDUAL about the practice that they OR their company are pursuing, they’d likely reject it, deny it and/or agree it’s wrong. BUT put it behind the wall of an organization & then all bets are off…including ANY etiquette. Sad thing is that it must work on some level. Example: the phishing emails — article we read explained that they super obvious ones are obvious for a reason — that anyone that would actually reply must be ignorant/willing.